| 00:00 - 00:03 | The Star runs out of Lager |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Paddy is running late |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Scouse Tony is out robbing |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Frank is propped up at the bar drunk |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | We are nearly ready to get pissed |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Great order 10 pints |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Mick is paying |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mien Dave |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Richard |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | He has been in here since 10.30am |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | He has drunk all the Lager |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Mick Paddy Steve Malcolm Russ |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I told you to look after him |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Now we are fucked |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | What do you suggest drinking Carlsberg piss |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Drink in the fucking spoons |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | With all those dirty piss |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Smelling coffin dodgers |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | God forbid i sit on a chair covered in piss |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Where is that fucking landlord Adam |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | We are sending for him |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Get me the brewery on the line now |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | They wont come out |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | You fucking idiot |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | What do we do! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Think of something |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Even Mick has got rid of the Pissed Newt |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | We will end up on a park bench |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Drinking fucking cider out of a bottle |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | On a park bench in Mellows park |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Smelling Paddy's turd from Mango |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I think im off home |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I warned you fuckers |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | And now there is no lager |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | What are we to do |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Go to Croydon? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | To be stabbed by some gang |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Or worse raped by one |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Get me back to Carshalton |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | At least they wont let him drink there |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I will get pissed alone |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | I think he is drunk already |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Banned from the woodman |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Banned from the Greyhound |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Dukes head |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | To fucking expensive |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Its Friday |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And now I cant have a drink |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | God help me |
