| 00:00 - 00:03 | The results for Scholastic came out |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | I logged into the website |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | and searched your name for prose and poetry |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | I double, triple, quadruple checked, |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | but nothing came up |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | You're saying not a silver key |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | nor even an honorable mention for my 28 submissions |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | This-- |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Scholastic's judging is subjective |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | it doesn't necessarily mean you suck |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All those who won gold keys, silver keys, or honorable mentions: leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | this some dumb dumb bubblegum BS |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | what the flying fuck |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | 50 people win gold medals every year for writing the same shit |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | being black or mexican or asian american or muslim |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | You could shit the words |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | "cultural identity" into a poem |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | and judges will |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | bust fat nuts over it |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Fuhrer, they showcase technical skill-- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Technical skill my ass! My big toe could write better shit! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Fuhrer, you're being a salty fuck |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | damn right I'm salty! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | fuck Scholastic |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | narcissistic ass writers |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | spewing the same unoriginal shit |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | it makes me sick |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | "look at me I'm so deep I wrote |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | about teen love or being LGBT or my sibling's death or feminism or Trump bashing" |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | it's so fuckin unoriginal |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | meanwhile they reject my writing just because it's a gay fanfic about Stalin |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I deserved a gold key |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | colleges would've loved it |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | but instead I get nothing |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | while just the goddamn mention |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | of an italicized non-english word gets showered with gold |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I've seen a girl write a love poem whose only gimmick is |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | the meaning changed when read from back to front |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | blatant plagiarism of "our generation" |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | but that shit got a medal! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | it's okay. at least you have one and he doesn't |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | it's over. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I'm going to quit writing and crawl into a corner |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | and spend the rest of my life |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | being depressed on Tumblr and 4chan |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | they don't even give feedback. for all I know |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | the judge could've thrown my writings out |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | without even looking at them |
