| 00:00 - 00:03 | There's word from the front that someone |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | who's not a bartender |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Made a Negroni and they shook it |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | We think it's someone from Italy which means the fate of all of |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | bartending is on the line and that the entire industry will implode |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | That's okay, as long as he used |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | the proper proportions, the industry is saved. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Grand Mixologist, |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | We think the gin may... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We think the gin may have been double the proportion |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and he squeezed orange juice in. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | 86 BOH, bussers, door staff, and anyone hungover |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | It's an equal parts drink! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | It has been an equal parts drink since forever! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Even dive bar bartenders can awaken from their stupor long enough to make a decent one. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Why couldn't he just Google it? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | The drink has 3 simple ingredients |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | and they are always equal parts! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | It's gin, Campari, and vermouth! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | And you put them in a mixing glass |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Grand Mixologist, the old bottle says you can shake it |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | I don't care what the old bottle says! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Grand Mixologist, dilution is all that matters! |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | And how will you get the right dilution if |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | you don't stir it until |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | your carpal tunnel starts acting up? |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | You bring up "the old bottle" like that means anything. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | They used to use bugs to make their red dye for God's sake! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And some random actor who knows that Campari is from Milan |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | suddenly decides that he can change the whole drink? |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | He's like a barback who wants to have menu input! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Jesus, even people who make lemon drops can make a good Negroni, |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | That's the point of the whole drink being easy! |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | The drink is so old even @fuckcocktailsanddie hasn't made fun of it |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | and they're desperate for content. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | We've made a mess of every other |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | drink that's been around for a hundred years. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I just wanted one that people couldn't screw with |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | and then maybe we could finally stop |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | putting it in a fucking barrel and acting like we deserve |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | a damn James Beard award. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, you don't have a shift with him until next week. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | The craft cocktail revolution has mostly |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | just pissed everyone off. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | And we got some great recipes. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Now, there's a tiki bar on every corner. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | But we had the Negroni to guide us through the narrows of mustaches and wallflowers with a jigger |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | and loud-mouthed guys trying to make us use a butt funnel. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | #hospitality #blessed |
