| 00:00 - 00:03 | Sightings of your missing ball have been reported |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | From Tottenham |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to Khurfürstendamm nearby |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Reports of it being in the Albert Hall are false |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | so we will continue our seach here. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Whatever. I will win |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | everthing with just my one ball |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Our fear is.. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Janners |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Janners have a new Austrian coach |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | He is great with one ball |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone whose bought a half 'n' half scarf or 'follow' another team. Leave! |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | You farts are pathetic! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Our spies at Home Park are pathetic! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Foster telling the squad to wait until he ate all his Sauerkraut |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | And that Rooney |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Singing Lilli Marlene |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | in German after being on the piss, |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | We rented his Granny Flat |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | close enough to to walk or cycle! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | The Beryl bikes were trashed and so was he |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | An Uber arriving in a Panzer? Whos idea was that? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Führer he wanted to impress a burd he pulled... |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | And here i am with one ball and my pen-is dry |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Its all I hear! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Shrinks say that me wanting Argyle |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | to go down is because Eva Braun won't |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | She laughs at this slug on my face |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | how do I end up looking like Charlie Chaplin |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Muslic is so good looking that even Swilly dogs try to shag his leg |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Is it so hard to understand |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I just want two balls and a one beard! Like Stalin |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | He orates like Churchill |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Words of strength, strength and bravery |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | he has the X factor |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | We're fecked. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Our Goose Step look like The Ministry Of Silly Walks |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | whilst he wins hearts talking of bloody Goose Bumps! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Then they beat Brentford |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | His debut appearance ends in victory |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Taking credit for Nance and Joe, |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Dont cry Liverpool's next |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe I should just give up |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | If I had a balcony off I'd jump |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | No chance down here |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | The trick is pronouns |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Bit of botox here, lip filler, maybe anal bleaching |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I could pass for any Muff burd |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I want to be known as Hilary |
