| 00:00 - 00:03 | That's where the helicopter flew |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | John Coates on the way to Plymouth |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | We never stood a chance |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | He landed it on bloody Plymouth Hoe |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Straight down to Home Park |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | We allowed him to whisk Schumacher away |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | From right under our noses |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mr Dewsnip, what can I say? |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | I was shocked |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We didn't think he'd come by air |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | We only know about boats in Plymouth |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone out save for Nancekivell, Turner & Dickinson |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | How did this happen? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | We gave him all the scouse he could eat! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | The players had language lessons so they could understand him |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | We gave his useless mates Hughes and Cavanagh jobs |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | We even upped his salary by a tenner in the summer |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Threw in a free pasty every Friday |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Paid every last penny we had for Whittaker |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Persuaded Azaz & Cundle to sign on loan |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Don't worry, Neil, we'll keep hold of them |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Keep hold of them, they'll all leave now, you see! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | We'll bring in a big name replacement |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Really? The last big name to come to Plymouth was Francis Drake! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | League One here we come! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Derbies with Exeter, away days to Port Vale! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | I mean, where even is that? |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | It is not a real place..... |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | ......and the people there don't wash |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | We'll be back to signing players from Tiverton and Truro |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | We'll have to beg Ginsters to come back to sponsor us |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Even if their pasties do taste like crap |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | What about the Stokies? |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | They'll mercilessly poke fun at us |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | with their oatcakes and "ey up, duck" |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | All for a bloke with a German name who I can't even understand |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Promised a few extra quid, some Grecian 2000 and elocution lessons for his kids |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | What does Stoke have that we don't? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Okay, a Premier League quality stadium & training ground |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Billionaire owners, a club not stuck at the arse end of nowhere |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Millions to invest in the squad, talented youngsters signed last summer |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Cheer up, I'll take you to the Swallow later |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I can't take being laughed at by Exeter fans |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | The only manager we can get is one escaping Saudi |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | but we still have Azaz & Cundle |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | well, we do, don't we? |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | You better focus on 20th April |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | we must beat Stoke away |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | though unlikely with Schuey at the wheel |
