| 00:00 - 00:03 | So Team Sky be sitting in yellow by Stage 18 |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | with just the hilly ITT |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to secure victory |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Wiping away the stench of WADA |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Smashing all those bastards on Twitter |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Yes that will prove me GOAT |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Stick their huge inhalers up their bastard arses |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Herr Froome, Sir Dave |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Sir Dave thinks that |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | It may be time for another rider to win the TDF |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | We don't want it to look obvious... |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who hasn't pissed in a bottle leave the room now |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Someone else to win a Grand Tour? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Who the fuck is going to do that aside from me? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | It's that welsh fucker G isn't it? The back stabbing fucker should stick to sheep |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | The things I went through to bring supremacy to Sky. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | not just Brian Cookson |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Do you think it was easy riding up Ventoux |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Looking like a fucking moron waving my elbows in the wind? |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | falling off like a stunt monkey just to get a fresh motor |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | But the batteries don't last for a stage |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | And then there is the Salbutomol you make me take |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Your Highness, that was sir Brad's idea |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Fuck Sir Brad. It gives me the shits, 2 kg a stage |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | My ring piece is in tatters |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | You think I did all this for fun? |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | To be passed over for a Welshman? |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | I've not even won Sports Personality of the year yet |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | You think I like being beaten by Andy Murray? |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | He has the personality of a ferret's testes and looks as happy as Trump's fluffer. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | You bunch of cowardly weasels |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Well you've done it this time, after I've finished you'll only be good for Astana |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Go on then, Why this? Why now? Why G? |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | What has he got? Is it Carlton behind this? |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | He's always "G This and G that" |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | He can't even say his name |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Mine is easy to pronounce and I have a foreign Je ne c'est pas too |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I'm from Kenya, we have proper mountains not like fucking Snowdon |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Oh that doesn't count because Wales has Tom Jones |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | And he was mates with Elvis fucking Presley |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Just like Lance fucking Armstrong probably |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Oh I get it, this is all about David Walsh |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Well you can have your Welsh victory |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I hate getting covered in piss and that bloke with the devil costume |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | fuck it |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I'll write my memoirs just like Freeman |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | It was fun while it lasted, remember me ragging it up behind Sir Wiggo? |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | What was with those sideburns ? |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | You didn't need a knighthood anyway |
