| 00:00 - 00:05 | So about two months ago |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | This guy - lets call him Marco T |
| 00:07 - 00:10 | Comes to my range |
| 00:11 - 00:16 | And he says “ Can you improve my swing ?” |
| 00:17 - 00:21 | So I look at his swing |
| 00:21 - 00:24 | And its awful |
| 00:29 - 00:31 | So I want to tell him |
| 00:31 - 00:34 | That I cant help |
| 00:38 - 00:40 | But then I see the Porsche |
| 00:41 - 00:47 | And I think, I want his money |
| 00:47 - 00:50 | His moolah boolah !!!! |
| 00:50 - 00:56 | So instead of telling him |
| 00:58 - 00:59 | To try Bowls or Chess |
| 00:59 - 01:01 | Or Dungeons and Dragons |
| 01:04 - 01:06 | I tell him his swing |
| 01:06 - 01:08 | Has great Potential |
| 01:13 - 01:14 | So I tell him some |
| 01:14 - 01:16 | Complete Bollox |
| 01:16 - 01:20 | About swinging out to in |
| 01:21 - 01:27 | And off he goes. |
| 01:35 - 01:36 | Next week he’s back |
| 01:36 - 01:39 | And I forget what I said |
| 01:41 - 01:44 | And tell him |
| 01:44 - 01:47 | The complete opposite !! |
| 01:47 - 01:49 | And when he questions me |
| 01:50 - 01:53 | I tell him I coach |
| 01:54 - 01:56 | Padraig Harrington |
| 01:56 - 01:58 | And Paddy does this |
| 01:58 - 02:02 | HE BUYS IT |
| 02:05 - 02:07 | Couldnt believe it |
| 02:10 - 02:11 | M U G G |
| 02:11 - 02:13 | So I phone my friend |
| 02:15 - 02:17 | Sidney - another coach |
| 02:17 - 02:20 | And I say “Sid!” |
| 02:21 - 02:28 | “This guy you sent me” |
| 02:29 - 02:30 | “Is pure gold” |
| 02:30 - 02:32 | And Sid says “Yeah !” |
| 02:36 - 02:39 | “He paid for my hols |
| 02:40 - 02:42 | In Benidorm last year” |
| 02:50 - 02:55 | And I told him bollox too |
| 02:56 - 02:58 | Absolute bollox !! |
| 02:58 - 03:04 | Tte truth is the chap |
| 03:04 - 03:09 | Cant hit snow off a rope |
| 03:09 - 03:11 | But is so keen |
| 03:16 - 03:20 | He’ll pay for any old shite |
| 03:23 - 03:26 | Padraig Fucking H !!! |
| 03:31 - 03:36 | Oh my God ! |
