| 00:00 - 00:03 | So anyone south of Stonehaven is a Hun |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | And everyone north of Inverurie is a Tim |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | That leaves us with the Bridge of Don |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | You consider it a mink ridden hole that gives us "Real North East Men" a bad name |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | And it should be wiped off the map forever |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | At least we won't have to drive past it |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | In order to get Dayts birthday party. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Ah about that |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Well |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Despite the amount of arse licking you do |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | You have not been invited to the party after all |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All those who don't understand, don't invest in Crypto or buy cars with cash leave now |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Are you fucking kidding me |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | That minesweeping cunt has failed to invite me? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | All the Hat regulars will be going and it was my chance to impress them in person |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I bet you that cunt Cavey is the bloody DJ |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | What do I have to do to be liked on the hat? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Don't they appreciate my genius? |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | I was told I would be box office stuff if I returned again |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | The hat was on its fucking knees before I re-joined |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Come on it was hardly Dons Talk |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Fuck Dons Talk and fuck AbMad |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Perhaps if you were not angry all the time |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Angry, I'm the most level headed and calmest guy on the hat |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Don't you fucking understand? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | I started a pish betting thread |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Specifically to fit in and to send Man Boobs to Dublin |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | But do they like me for it, do they fuck |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Fuck me even that old cunt Dad's weekly treble is more popular |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | And don't get me started on that stinky bastard Bris Faroese fucking Foursome |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | It's not my fault I was shite at picking winners |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I wish I had invested in Cryptos earlier and kept all the info on an error free spreadsheet |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Want me to tell you some other examples |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | The lengths I go to arse lick in order to be accepted |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | But does it work, does it fuck |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I don't understand |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | I voted for the SNP twice to piss off CS despite being told by Caledonia that it was a waste of time |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I even bought fucking Zubr beer and pretended to take drugs just so Misers would like me |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | I hated cunts who go for long walks |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Just to get tight with Don Fonte |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Then I realised Poodler did it and had to back track |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | We can cheer him up by making Chicken Pakora for tea |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | The mutants are taking over |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | They are wrong about me all the fucking time |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Ahhh no |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I really don't know what to do |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | 100 posts a day of inane shite just to get access into the 1000 club |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Only to find Mobz posts voyeur pics which Poodler likes |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Bet they wish they invited Tup back instead |
