| 00:00 - 00:03 | The allegations are coming from all directions. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | A groping accusation from the east, and drugging from the north. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | We also have Nick Farr on Medium claiming harassment. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | We can deny everything. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Tell Shari I have a publicist. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Shari... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Shari Steele has published a post claiming you've resigned. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | ...and a follow-up mentioning sexual mistreatment. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone leave except my lawyer, publicist, and make-up artist. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | This is a calculated attack! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | A calculated and targeted attack! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Vague rumors and smear campaigns against me are nothing new. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | As a longtime public advocate for free speech and a secure Internet, |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | there have been plenty of attempts to undermine my work over the years! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | This is character assassination straight from an S.S. manual! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Haters on Twitter are jealous of my noble mission, |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | and legendary coding skills! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Fuhrer, the git repository doesn't show a single line of- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | I USED THE CYPERPUNKS ACCOUNT. |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Fuhrer, you spent two years writing an ntp clone. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | It got the current date from a TLS handshake, that takes skill, you moron. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | You talk like a bitch! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | You get a girl drunk and show her love in front of her friends, |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | and no one can stomach what a noble person I'm being! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Instead of my love notes for Nick Farr, I should have left garbage! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | I am kind enough to give neophytes critiques of their work, and this is how they repay me! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | I didn't even get a tweet in my defense from Julian Assange, or WikiLeaks! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | After all I've done for freedom and anonymity on the Internet! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | If it weren't for my heroic efforts, the Internet would be ruled by Stalin! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I only resigned to focus on academia. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I'm studying under the world's greatest cryptographer, the biggest cryptographer |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | This was supposed to make me prestigious! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Traitors... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Traitors envious of my beautiful looks and brilliant mind! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | If only I could bring Len back to life to make him come up with a new idea for me! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | But no, he had to kill himself... |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | ...the selfish asshole had to kill himself! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | What about my academic record? Also dead! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's okay Anna... he can't harm you anymore. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | It's over. I was too beautiful for them. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Julian was right. There's no world for a dancing star. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Call the Ecuadorian embassy... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | ...see if they have a bunk bed. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I heard Julian has a cat now... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | ...maybe it's not so bad. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Haters gonna hate. |
