| 00:00 - 00:03 | Eglin Air Force Base has deployed 100 new shills in /r/btc |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | They typically make shitposts |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | In these highly up voted threads |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They target posts mentioning Jihan Wu, or Roger Ver |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | And also Craig Wright, AKA "fake Satoshi" |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | So we have successfully manipulated public opinion? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Make them think SegWit2x is an altcoin... |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Führer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | The miners... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The miners have all migrated to Bitcoin Cash |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Everyone but Blockstream has abandoned the Core 1x chain |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone except Greg, Luke, and Matt, get out |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | What the fucking FUCK guys?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | What the fuck am I paying your dumb asses for?! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | We censored /r/Bitcoin and banned anyone who promoted big blocks |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | We even paid off Bitfinex to call Bitcoin Cash "Bcash" |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | All the major Core developers work for Blockstream |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Gregory Maxwell, Luke Dashjr, Matt Corallo, Pieter Wuille, Jorge Timón |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | We completely controlled Bitcoin's development! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | And the entire fucking Bitcoin ecosystem just moves to a different chain?! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Führer, our chain is crippled with 1 MB blocks, we're a laughing stock |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | We gave them SegWit, we told them it was a block size increase! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Führer, they see right through our bullshit, it's no use |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Bitcoin Cash was supposed to be a fucking shitcoin altcoin |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | And now it's the chain with the most proof of work?! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | We told them that miners don't matter |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | We spun up thousands of Bitcoin Core nodes |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | And now Nakamoto consensus is fucking up our shit?! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | We sold fucking hats, people put [NO2X] in their Twitter usernames! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | And now we have 8 fucking megabyte blocks on Bitcoin Cash?! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Luke even said blocks should be 300 KB! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | ASICboost, Antbleed, UASF, NO2X, none of it worked! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | They can finally buy their fucking coffee |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I was supposed to be the king. I made hashcash! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Bitcoin is hashcash extended with inflation control! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Why did I ignore Satoshi's email... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | I bought my first Bitcoin at the top of the 2013 bubble! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | And you so called security experts lost all your Bitcoins in MtGox! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Tone Vays said Bitcoin Cash would trade under a dollar! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Now it's trading at 0.33 BTC and pumping hard |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | We are witnessing the fucking flippening! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, I diversified our portfolio into Dogecoin |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | AXA is going to want their $76 million back |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | The Bilderberg group is going to be fucking pissed |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | We need to liquidate all our assets |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Sell the rest of the hats |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Tell Samson Mow not to come into work tomorrow, I'm deleting his Twitter |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Tell theymos his last paycheck will come in the mail on Monday |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Someone HODL me, I'm gonna cry |
